Archive for October 5, 2025

Endigar 1054

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on October 5, 2025 by endigar

From Courage to Change of Oct 5:

Sometimes I become so bogged down with dissatisfaction that I can’t see where I am or where I’m going. When I take time to “Think,” I realize that negativity keeps my life at a standstill. Al-Anon has helped me discover that, while it’s good to acknowledge whatever I feel, I have a choice about where to focus my attention. I’m challenged to find positive qualities in myself, my circumstances, and other human beings. As I attend meetings, list the things I am grateful for, and talk with other Al-Anon members, these attributes become apparent — if I’m willing to see them.

I believe I have a beautiful spirit that has been created for some purpose. The people and situations I encounter each day also have beauty and purpose. I can begin to look for the positive in everything I do and see. The perspective I’ve gained by doing so has shown me that some of the most difficult times in my life have produced the most wonderful changes.

Today’s Reminder

It may be difficult to break a long-established pattern of depression, doom-sayings, and complaining, but it’s worth the effort. I’ll replace a negative attitude with a positive one today.

“Sometimes I go about pitying myself. And all the while I am being carried across the sky. By beautiful clouds.” ~ Ojibway Indian saying

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There are moments when dissatisfaction thickens around me like fog—when my mind can only find what’s missing, what’s wrong, what’s unfair. In that haze, I lose sight of where I stand and where I’m going. Al-Anon reminds me that this fog is not truth; it is simply focus. My eyes have turned toward lack. My thoughts have pitched their tents in complaint. When I shift that gaze, I begin to see movement again.

Acknowledging pain is not the same as worshipping it. I can let my feelings rise and fall like waves, but I do not have to drown in them. The discipline of “Think” teaches me to pause before I descend into the whirlpool—to choose what I will amplify. Gratitude, even when whispered, begins to pierce through the fog.

Meetings help me remember that I am not uniquely cursed; I am part of a fellowship of souls learning to steer our minds toward light. Gratitude lists, honest conversations, the quiet presence of others walking the same road—these become the small lanterns that line my path.

Over time, I’ve begun to glimpse something holy in this practice: I do not have to create beauty; I have to notice it. My spirit was already fashioned with purpose. Even my hardships have been tutors in disguise, forcing growth I would never have chosen, revealing a tenderness I didn’t know I had.

Today, I can look at my life and say:
“I will think toward light.”
I can trust that the most difficult seasons—those that once looked like ruin—were actually turning the soil for better roots.

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Endigar 1053

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on October 5, 2025 by endigar

From Courage to Change of Oct 4:

I’ve heard it said that in Al-Anon we try to concentrate on our similarities rather than our differences. This doesn’t mean that we don’t have differences or that we shouldn’t acknowledge these differences. What it does suggest is that, by remembering why we are all here, we need never feel alone.

Like so many others, I came to Al-Anon feeling that my problems set me apart from everyone else. As time passed, I realized that it was my own fear and shame, and not the embarrassing details of my problems, that kept me at a distance. I learned that when I reached beyond these details, I could clasp the hands of others affected by alcoholism and thus find help.

We are all as unique as our fingerprints, but as our fingers join in the closing prayer, each of us is part of a circle of hope that is greater than any of our individual differences.

Today’s Reminder

Although we have our unique qualities, all hearts beat the same under the skin. Your heart reaches out to mine as you share your story and your faith. I know that the part of myself which I share with you is taken to your heart. Today I will cherish our collective strength.

“For the body is one and has many members, but all the members of that one body, being many, are one body.” ~ The Bible

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There is a reality that speaks to me: the subtle but radical shift from isolation born of shame to connection born of shared purpose. When I first came into the rooms, my instinct was to catalog my differences — to treat my pain like a fingerprint that no one else could decipher. But that impulse, though it felt self-protective, was also self-imprisoning. It was not my particular circumstances but my fear and shame that kept me separate.

In 12 Step Recovery, the invitation is not to erase individuality but to reframe it. I do not have to abandon my story or my uniqueness. Instead, I am asked to remember why we are all here: to find a path toward serenity in the midst of mine or someone else’s drinking, and to walk that path together. When I look beyond the details of my situation, I discover an invisible thread tying my heart to others’ hearts. That thread is stronger than the storylines that once isolated me.

I can remember being resistant to the religious nature of the prayers used in recovery. But then I saw that without the burden of dogma, it became an exercise in connection. Every hand retains its own lines and swirls, but together they make a circle. The circle does not cancel difference; it holds it, transforming it into a shared strength. That is the paradox of recovery: when I risk reaching beyond my shame, I discover that what I thought made me untouchable is the very place where connection begins.

Now I can cherish our collective strength without losing myself. I can honor the uniqueness of my fingerprint and still place my hand in the circle, knowing that under the skin our hearts beat the same. In that shared rhythm, I am never alone.

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