Archive for September 3, 2008

Endigar 75

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on September 3, 2008 by endigar

Are you about finished with those questions?  Good grief.

Just a few more.  Here is the next one:

10.  Has the fear of economic insecurity left you?

No, not completely.  I know this is a trust issue with my Higher Power and I am actively working on this.  I received a promise tonight through an intuitive journal.  My one year tag is going to be a prosperity guarantee.  I know, that could be a misread on my part and if you hear God promise to move a mountain, make sure to bring a shovel.  I know this.  But when I can trust HP on this, the fear leaves me.  I actually look forward to testing the reality of this promise.  Ultimately, serenity must not be dependant on outer circumstances.  But I think serenity, this trust in the magic of the universe, does have an impact on the physical environment.  Whatever is happening on the inside gets reflected on the outside.  Such is my hope. 

I went to my first Al Anon meeting tonight, with Sponsee One.  The speaker was someone I had just made amends to.  I think I need to take advantage of that.  He has invited me to a men’s only Al Anon meeting nearby.  Maybe so.

Endigar 74

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on September 3, 2008 by endigar

Next question;

9.  Has the fear of people left you?

It’s intensity has decreased.  During my drinking, I can remember having difficulty getting outside of the apartment.  I have always had difficulty connecting with others, but when I began to nurture my pathological relationship with alcohol, familiarity and closeness with others brought accountability I did not desire.  But, through the program, I have been able to connect with others in a way I never have.  I would say that it is even closer than the camaraderie I felt from being in the military, because there is no overwhelming sense of being judged.  I am understood on some very basic levels.

The fear of people has left me, most of the time.  Being annoyed with people is something I am still working on.  Progress prior to perfection, I guess.