Daily Reprieve

Courage to Change of Jun 7:

When I took Step Five I looked carefully at the words, “Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being . . ..” The order of these words, placing God first, then myself, and then someone else, struck me. So often I have been vaguely aware of some truth in my life that I was unwilling to admit to myself. Yet my Higher Power had already placed that thought in my mind. He must have –if I’m trying to ignore it, I surely didn’t put it there.

I try to use this when making decisions about my life. When I assume that my Higher Power has already put the answer in my mind, I can then be willing to acknowledge that answer– whether I think I’ll like it or not. It may rise up into my awareness right away, or it may take some time and patience, but I can trust that it will become clear. Then I share my thoughts with another person I trust. This process helps me to take action on the answers I receive and to move forward with my life.

Today’s Reminder

There is nothing in life that need confound me. With my Higher Power’s help, I can find the answer to any problem I face. This knowledge gives me courage to follow through with action. I need only be willing to accept the answer I receive.

“Look within! . . . The secret is inside you.”

~ Hui-neng

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There was once a great argument about whether zero actually exists. Mathematics deals with calculations of what is. Was there actually a place where absolute nothingness was true? In the end, pragmatism won out. Zero makes mathematics work. Is the concept of God a variable for the absolute infinity of existence? In the 12 Step program, the God concept wins out because it works. Not because we can answer with absolutes.

“I try to use this when making decisions about my life.” Pragmatism over absolutes. Transformation over transaction. I never face impossibilities, mystery, or completions without a surrender to my Higher Power’s pragmatic reality protecting my efforts. As in mathematics, I have an “order of operation.” I seek inspiration from the macro-infinity (God out there), confirmation from the micro-infinity (God within me) and working validation through the connective infinity of those invested in recovery of the highest version of self.

Personology is a word I created by splicing Personal Mythology. Because the denotation of mythology is something not true but fabricated from imagination, it was inadequate to describe what I meant when I said Personal Mythology. There are four parameters that define one’s Personology:

• Creative Story Writing to capture elusive or paradoxical concepts and express them with the simplest clarity possible
• Spiritual Hypothesis Testing to explore incoming evidence and ongoing experience with life beyond the organic veil
• Establishes a Peace Treaty with the swirling chaos and mystery of our environment
• Provides Pragmatic Inspiration for the living of our individual mortal lives

Use it if it fulfills the pragmatic imperative of your recovery.

Courage to Change of Jun 6:

How easy it can be to justify our own unacceptable behavior! Perhaps we excuse ourselves, claiming that we were provoked or had no choice. Or we dismiss our actions by telling ourselves that everyone does the same thing. With these and other justifications, we pretend that our wrongs don’t count. This denial must be overcome when we take the Fourth Step.

With this Step we take a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. It is fearless because of the strong spiritual foundation we have established by taking the first three Steps. It is moral because we list what we feel has been right or wrong about our conduct. And it is searching. The only way we can take this Step thoroughly, searchingly, is to resist the desire to justify and excuse what we uncover. It may demand courage and self-discipline, but by freely acknowledging who we have been, we can make positive changes about who we are becoming.

Today’s Reminder

I am a human being with strengths and weaknesses, capable of achievements and mistakes. Because I accept this, I can look closely at myself. Today I will find something to appreciate and something to improve.

“You never find yourself until you face the truth.”

~ Pearl Bailey

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There are several delusion producers in my life: programing from a dysfunctional family, addiction’s self-protection in my psyche, layers of fear from perceived threats, and the manifold coping skills to accommodate pain aversion.

In the 12 Step program, I have found that Hope and Action with a litmus test of whether I am helpful to others is my primary method of living a genuine life. Hope targets a destination of value. Action keeps that hope from metastasizing into wishful thinking. The usefulness to others proves the value of my work.

The moral inventory helps me see the truth about me and the life I have been living. It is a process that gives spirituality and self-recovery a pragmatic push toward fulfilment of whatever part of the Higher Power has been embedded within.