Archive for October 30, 2014

Endigar 571 ~ Fixing Me, Not You

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on October 30, 2014 by endigar

From the Daily Reflections of October 10;

If somebody hurts us and we are sore, we are in the wrong also.  (Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, page 90)

What a freedom I felt when this passage was pointed out to me! Suddenly I saw that I could do something about my anger, I could fix me, instead of trying to fix them. I believe that there are no exceptions to the axiom. When I am angry, my anger is always self-centered. I must keep reminding myself that I am human, that I am doing the best I can, even when that best is sometimes poor. So I ask God to remove my anger and truly set me free.

 

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Spock_performing_Vulcan_salute

This is not a call to become a Vulcan (Live Long and Prosper) by purging ourselves of all emotional responses.  Anger is natural and may serve a purpose to warn us of changes that need to take place in our approach to life.  I think what the 12 & 12 is identifying as wrong is a seething, festering anger that corrodes the resistance to impulsive, reactive living.  When anger comes, I need to use the steps to process it.  I must insure that it is an event and not a lifestyle.

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Endigar 570 ~ A Spiritual Axiom

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on October 30, 2014 by endigar

From the Daily Reflections of October 9;

It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us.   (Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, page 90)

I never truly understood the Tenth Step’s spiritual axiom until I had the following experience. I was sitting in my bedroom, reading into the wee hours, when suddenly I heard my dogs barking in the back yard. My neighbors frown on this kind of disturbance so, with mixed feelings of anger and shame, as well as fear of my neighbors’ disapproval, I immediately called in my dogs. Several weeks later the exact situation repeated itself but this time, because I was feeling more at peace with myself, I was able to accept the situation—dogs will bark—and I calmly called in the dogs. Both incidents taught me that when a person experiences nearly identical events and reacts two different ways, then it is not the event which is of prime importance, but the person’s spiritual condition. Feelings come from inside,not from outward circumstances. When my spiritual condition is positive, I react positively.

 

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LittleBrotherBlackLG

It is dangerous to stay in my head when I am disturbed.  Ruminating over my depressive feelings entraps me.  The alcoholic disease wraps around the paralysis of analysis.  I hope that I can let the disturbance signal that action needs to be taken.   I embrace the pragmatic and progressive morality of AA rather than the damning pursuit of perfectionism.  Recognizing that my disturbance is a warning flag for internal issues is a very useful spiritual axiom.

IMAGE FROM: [ http://www.thehorrordome.com/ ]

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