Daily Reprieve

From Courage to Change of February 20;

One of the first things I heard in Al-Anon was that we didn’t have to accept unacceptable behavior. This idea helped me to see that I need not tolerate violence or abuse, and that I had choices I hadn’t even recognized before. I set some limits, not to control others, but to offer myself guidelines so that I would know what was and was not acceptable and what to do  about it.

A few years later I was congratulating myself on how I no longer had such problems, when I suddenly realized that there was still one person from whom I regularly accepted unacceptable behavior –me! I was continually berating myself and blaming myself when things went wrong. I never gave myself credit for my efforts. I told myself I  was homely, thoughtless, lazy, stupid. I would never say those things to a friend. I realized that until I started  treating myself like a valued friend, I would be standing in the way of my own recovery.

Today’s Reminder

I  have been affected by a disease of attitudes. When I treat myself with love and  approval, I know that I am recovering.

“Let one therefore keep the mind pure, for what a man thinks, that he becomes.” – The Upanishads

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My faith in a Higher Power does a dance with faith in myself. I saw this connection when conducting my moral inventory and realized that most of my resentments were against myself and my God. I cannot build trust in the God of my understanding without likewise building a trust in me for myself. “To thine own self be true” means that I have to get to know me. The 12 Step program provides an opportunity to take myself out on dates and develop an understanding of who I am. That relationship deserves a protection in the boundaries I set. And just like another human being that I would date in pursuit of intimate connection, I must protect it from harsh, hurtful treatment.

I have a family member in the program who received this bit of advice that I think is appropriate here: “If you want self-esteem, do esteemable things.” I think one of those things worthy of esteem is how I choose to treat myself.

This entry was posted on November 28, 2017 at 9:57 am and is filed under Uncategorized with tags Addiction, Alcoholism, Courage to Change, Journal, Life, Personal, Recovery, Spirituality. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.