Endigar 856

From Courage to Change of April 26:

The most important words many of us hear when we first come to Al-Anon are, “Take what you like, and leave the rest.” Everything about our program is suggested, not required. This gives us the freedom to pick and choose. If we disagree with something, we don’t have to use it. If we are not ready to use a Step, slogan, or tool, we are free to wait.

Many of us need time to come to terms with the spiritual nature of the Al-Anon program. If we were required to believe in a Higher Power in order to participate in Al-Anon, we might never have continued to attend meetings. Eventually, many of us do come to believe in a Higher Power because we are free to come to our own understanding in our own time. That way, whatever we learn will have meaning for us.

When we take what we like and leave the rest, we give ourselves permission to challenge new ideas, to make decisions for ourselves, and even to change our minds.

Today’s Reminder

Because I am able to use whatever I find helpful and leave the rest, I can benefit from the experience, strength, and hope of others and still follow my own heart.

“With the help of this program and my Higher Power, I take charge of fashioning, shaping, choosing what kind of life I will have.”

. . . In All Our Affairs

END OF QUOTE—————————————

This is a critical aspect of the 12 Step program for me. I have lived my life dancing around tripwires to maintain a semblance of peace in the home. I have lived in fear of failing everchanging expectations. My life was a disappointment waiting to happen. It was a binding façade for the sake of emotional survival.

Al-Anon’s assurance that I could take what was useful and leave the rest was a new way of building my home. I am encouraged to embrace both personal liberty and responsibility and I relish this new air I am breathing.

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