Endigar 781
From Courage to Change of February 18;
Daily practice of the Al-Anon program is helping me to become more tolerant of other people. For example, when I take my own inventory and examine my motives, I recognize the same shortcomings I once eagerly pointed out in others. It is easier to accept the limitations of others when I acknowledge my own.
I see now that my thinking has often been distorted, my behavior inconsistent. If my perceptions of myself have been so inaccurate, how reliable can my perceptions of others be? I really don’t know what anyone else should think, feel, or do. Therefore, I can no longer justify intolerance.
Regular, dedicated practice of the principles of the program keeps me feeling good about myself. This permits me to be increasingly open-minded and considerate toward everyone in my life.
Today’s Reminder
Al-Anon meetings, fellowship, Steps, Traditions, and literature all help me to improve my ability to relate to others. I will renew my commitment to recovery today.
“An earnest and concentrated study of the Al-Anon program, in depth, will help us to become more tolerant, confident, and loving, teaching us to accept the faults of others as we seek to correct shortcomings in ourselves.” ~ The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage
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The important lessons in truth and mercy have made appearances in my life, but the 12 Step program revealed these two gifts as something more than just a good idea. They are life-sustaining and enriching. When I was facing the harsh realities of alcoholism they were key to regaining my life.
There is a saying in AA that is quoted oft from Shakespeare; “To Thine Own Self be True.” Going back to Hamlet the full quote is actually “This above all: to thine own self be true. And it must follow, as the night the day. Thou canst not then be false to any man.” The fearless moral inventory of the 12 Steps allowed me to see the truth about me. Before I did this, my attempts at honesty with others were skewed by the falsities I truly believed of myself. Obtaining and maintaining truth in my life is an event of courage and a process of vigilance. This has been the case for me.
Armed with the truth about myself, I saw the need for mercy in my life. I had to have room to fall and get back up, to recover. I obtained this by giving it to others. This does not mean that I abandon accountability and embrace enabling behavior. It means that I do not add the extra burden of harsh judgment that turns self-appraisal into morbid self-flagellation.
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