Endigar 743

From Courage to Change of January 15;

Recently I learned about a crisis in the life of an alcoholic I love. Today, while trying to work, I found myself slumping n my chair, depressed and distracted. Soon, all thoughts of work had fled, and I was busy projecting a horrible outcome to my loved one’s crisis and dreading the ways in which the consequences might affect me. The slogan, “One Day at a Time” reminds me that, in spite of my fears, I don’t know what tomorrow will bring.

Why am I leaping into the future? Perhaps I’ve given my feelings no room to exist. Part of me gambles that by worrying in advance, bad news will be easier to face if it comes. But worrying will not protect me from the future. It will just keep me from living here and now.

Today’s Reminder

I needn’t explore how I’ll feel about something that might occur in the future. I don’t actually know how I’ll feel, and it may never happen. So when I feel myself leaving the present, I’ll remind myself that the future is not today’s problem.

“Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow; it only saps today of its strength.” ~ A.J. Cronin


END OF QUOTE————————————————-

horse on tide

When I am outside of my comfort zone, anxiety comes. When shadow dragons inflame me with visions of darkness and uncertainty, my adrenal pumps. Fear is the primeval emotion, the oldest this physical body knows. When I love others who are vulnerable to risks they are undertaking, I worry.

As long as worry does not paralyze me, I will pass through it and continue to live. It will come and go like the ocean’s tide. Rumination is letting it paralyze me from daily living. Progress is living anyway, as a way of processing such negative emotions. Perfection is death, the rejection of my humanity. I seek progress, not perfection.

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