Endigar 490 ~ I Ask God to Decide

From Today’s Daily Reflections (Late Night 23rd);

“I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.”   (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 76)

Having admitted my powerlessness and made a decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of God, as I understand Him, I don’t decide which defects get removed, or the order in which defects get removed, or the time frame in which they get removed. I ask God to decide which defects stand in the way of my usefulness to Him and to others, and then I humbly ask Him to remove them.




I guess the morsel for meditation here is that there are some of my defects that are more obstructive than others to my usefulness to God and others.  The relevance to me is that I do become aware, ask for removal, and then live my life as usefully as possible.  I do not critique God’s process of removal with expectations about what short-comings get targeted first, how they are prioritized, or how quickly they get removed.  Those expectations may turn to disappointment and resentment that erode my simple spiritual trust in Gomu (God of my understanding).

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