Endigar 300

Sponsor Quest:  My female, acting as an Oracle, said that it appears that I need to go on a sponsor quest.  And that resonates.  I love my current sponsor, but he himself told me that I should probably get another one, he is going through so much.  I told him that I do continue to value his friendship.  He suggested I go to an Alanon meeting, maybe look at getting an Alanon sponsor.  But the Oracular guidance suggest that I need an AA sponsor that is a cross between my current one, who has a great compassionate heart, and the Moon Guide, who speaks clearly and probes with insight, and is an AA sponsor.  An alcoholic.  My previous two sponsors have both been CA sponsors, who were primarily cocaine addicts.  It makes sense.

I have referred to myself as a tortoise in life and personal pursuits.  I mentioned this in a meeting after smarting from my most recent relapse.  It’s taking me so much time to get this program.  I was encouraged that the tortoise wins the race over the hare by shear persistance.  This was in a CA meeting I love, Everything or Nothing group.  We call it EON.

Later I attended another meeting at JAFI’s, an AA meeting.  The topic was on finding a sponsor.  The topic leader started off saying that if you come across a turtle sitting on a fencepost, you know it had help.  This seemed to be confirmation that I do need a new sponsor.  But I will keep contact with my Heart Sponsor-friend, and the Moon Guide sponsor, and the Dark Oracle of Recovery.  So I my focus in recovery is to listen for something and someone new.

I am grateful that I still have my 3 Sep 2011 sobriety date.

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