Endigar 68

Alright.  I realize this is not a good place to be.  I do not underestimate this obsession.  I find myself not wanting to talk to my sponsor.  This disease is like a computer virus for the brain.  It has a negative programing that seems to key into vulnerabilities.  I know the work I have done is buying me time, but that will run out.  I was going to write that my phone is screwing up, which is slightly true.  Thus I am unable to talk to my sponsor.  Then I remembered that I just got off the phone with Sponsee One.  I confessed to my 14 year old daughter that my obsession has kicked in.  She gave some interesting advise about trying on different personas that you enjoy and whichever one feels enjoyable is closer to being the real you.  But, I know that I have to do something to catch this disease, which might even key into her advise to get me to do what is “natural” to do.  Ok, I am going to go ahead and call the sponsor.

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