Endigar 1053
From Courage to Change of Oct 4:
I’ve heard it said that in Al-Anon we try to concentrate on our similarities rather than our differences. This doesn’t mean that we don’t have differences or that we shouldn’t acknowledge these differences. What it does suggest is that, by remembering why we are all here, we need never feel alone.
Like so many others, I came to Al-Anon feeling that my problems set me apart from everyone else. As time passed, I realized that it was my own fear and shame, and not the embarrassing details of my problems, that kept me at a distance. I learned that when I reached beyond these details, I could clasp the hands of others affected by alcoholism and thus find help.
We are all as unique as our fingerprints, but as our fingers join in the closing prayer, each of us is part of a circle of hope that is greater than any of our individual differences.
Today’s Reminder
Although we have our unique qualities, all hearts beat the same under the skin. Your heart reaches out to mine as you share your story and your faith. I know that the part of myself which I share with you is taken to your heart. Today I will cherish our collective strength.
“For the body is one and has many members, but all the members of that one body, being many, are one body.” ~ The Bible
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There is a reality that speaks to me: the subtle but radical shift from isolation born of shame to connection born of shared purpose. When I first came into the rooms, my instinct was to catalog my differences — to treat my pain like a fingerprint that no one else could decipher. But that impulse, though it felt self-protective, was also self-imprisoning. It was not my particular circumstances but my fear and shame that kept me separate.
In 12 Step Recovery, the invitation is not to erase individuality but to reframe it. I do not have to abandon my story or my uniqueness. Instead, I am asked to remember why we are all here: to find a path toward serenity in the midst of mine or someone else’s drinking, and to walk that path together. When I look beyond the details of my situation, I discover an invisible thread tying my heart to others’ hearts. That thread is stronger than the storylines that once isolated me.
I can remember being resistant to the religious nature of the prayers used in recovery. But then I saw that without the burden of dogma, it became an exercise in connection. Every hand retains its own lines and swirls, but together they make a circle. The circle does not cancel difference; it holds it, transforming it into a shared strength. That is the paradox of recovery: when I risk reaching beyond my shame, I discover that what I thought made me untouchable is the very place where connection begins.
Now I can cherish our collective strength without losing myself. I can honor the uniqueness of my fingerprint and still place my hand in the circle, knowing that under the skin our hearts beat the same. In that shared rhythm, I am never alone.
Daily Reprieve 
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