Endigar 825
From Courage to Change of April 01;
I’ve heard acceptance mentioned at meetings as one part of the “Three A’s” — Awareness, Acceptance, and Action. However, I am inclined to try to jump from awareness to action without even pausing for acceptance. My thinking goes like this: “Something’s wrong! Quick, let me fix it before I have to feel any discomfort.”
The problem is that until I accept the situation , defect, or memory that has come to my awareness, I can rarely take effective action or live serenely with the consequences. The action doesn’t work or it makes things worse, and I feel helpless and hopeless. Even if it does work, I am usually too full of self-doubt to realize it. Most of the time, I still have to go back, sit still, feel the feelings, and come to some acceptance. It helps to be reminded that my Higher Power already accepts me and my situation–and loves me on the bad days as well as the good.
Today’s Reminder
Moving from awareness to acceptance to action takes time, but the benefits are worth the wait. As I learn to accept my defects, circumstances, and feelings, I learn that I am a worthwhile human being just as I am. With that kind of self-acceptance, I begin to see my options, and slowly I can begin to take action, to change.
“. . . Someone suggested I stop concentrating on changing myself and think first about accepting myself. That gave me the boost I needed.” ~ Alateen–a day at a time
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During my first rehab, I was “prescribed” to read the section in the book, Alcoholics Anonymous, that talked about acceptance being the solution to all my problems. I was to read it daily. I had issues I found unacceptable. Acceptance holds a central part in the Serenity Prayer as well.
To be honest, I do not recall ever hearing or reading about the three As of Al-Anon. It does not surprise me that acceptance is included. I think it is important that it is couple with awareness to prevent acceptance from fermenting into apathy. And I like the fact that it is linked with a destiny of some constructive action. It not a call to perpetual navel gazing nor a ticket to the isolated cell of morbid self-reflection. It is another manner in which we get to know ourselves, value our existence, and then to seek out a way to fulfill the mantra, “to thine own self be true.”
The developed skill of acceptance is a foundation for the capacity of tolerance necessary to help others. What I do to me, I will do to others. That is the reality this program has revealed to me. And I am grateful.
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