Endigar 539 ~ “We Asked His Protection”
From Today’s Daily Reflections;
We asked His protection and care with complete abandon. (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 59)
I could not manage my life alone. I had tried that road and failed. My “ultimate sin” dragged me down to the lowest level I have ever reached and, unable even to function, I accepted the fact that I desperately needed help. I stopped fighting and surrendered entirely to God.
Only then did I start growing! God forgave me. A Higher Power had to have saved me, because the doctors doubted that I would survive. I have forgiven myself now and I enjoy a freedom I have never before experienced. I’ve opened my heart and mind to Him. The more I learn, the less I know — a humbling fact — but I sincerely want to keep growing. I enjoy serenity, but only when I entrust my life totally to God. As long as I am honest with myself and ask for His help, I can maintain this rewarding existence.
Just for today, I strive to live His will for me — soberly.
I thank God that today I can choose not to drink.
Today, life is beautiful!
END OF QUOTE
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I want my trust of Gomu (God of my understanding) to be a once and for all absolute decision. I want the Infinite One to be happy with me and to communicate intimately to me in a way that I can hear. I am thankful for the reality that I can chose not to drink. I wish that I could live a life of consensual non-consent in an absolute surrender to the God who loves me. I am afraid of my own will when I am alone with a mind that I can never totally trust. For some reason, my Higher Power seems to trust me. I am not so sure that is a good idea. I will take what I have and attempt to trust and be trustworthy. I am very grateful.
(Picture is Hand of God sculpture in London, sculptor is Lorenzo Quinn)
Daily Reprieve 
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