Endigar 188

I have often been sensitive to the possible hi-jacking of the spirituality of this program by the poor substitute of religion.  And one area that really sets off alarms is the proclamation of the “Infallibility of the Written Word of God.”  I believe that was intended to squash dissent and control the message and behavior of the faithful.  But I think the enforcement of that doctrine helped put much of the spiritually inclined people into a religiously induced coma.  And we saw many things develop in society because, not only did good people do nothing, but they were actually unable to do anything. 

I do not want to see this repeated with the Big Book. 

Yet I need to have something to inspire sobriety.  My argumentation with churchian corruptions can also cause me to throw the baby out with the  bathwater.  The question then is how to reconcile this tension, so that I can continue to use this material that I have witnessed actually helping others to regain their lives? 

Maybe my answer is in the creative process itself.  I trust that when someone writes, or creates, they learn to open themselves to spirits outside of themselves.  They unite with these forces, or that force, and are taken away by it.  I have experienced this.  Maybe it is like someone once said, that those who are of the Spirit are like the wind, you don’t know where they are coming from or where they are going, but you know it is real because you can feel the effects. 

So maybe there are many documents that are human attempts to capture this wind for just a moment and pass on the experience, this Vital Spiritual Experience.  In this perspective, it is not necessary to claim the religiously arrogant stance that I know where it came from, I know where it is going…I simply stop and feel it, accept it, as being actual.  And maybe my spirit will awaken as a result of taking steps toward a faith that works. 

There is a scene in the movie “Fearless” were Jet Li, as he is working in a rice patty, learns to do like the others around him, and when the breeze comes through, they all stop and just allow themselves to feel it.  I have copied this practice.  It really is a potent reminder of spiritual, creative reality. 

My sponsor directed me to read page 62.  And I have some arguments with the way it is written, the religion that drips from its words.  But if I believe that a loving and concerned Spirit inspired people to catch the wind, for just a moment in time, then my goal is not intellectual dissection of its words nor religious proclamations of its concepts.  I must find a way to rest, and feel it.  And allow it to create something new in me. 

If I face the Big Book with the thought that it is either dangerous or dead, it will be of no value to me.  And to deny that a collective of anguished human souls who came together following an intuitive lead from an unknown Spirit, a truly loving Deity…is not that great of a leap for me.  Now, I am going to see if this helps me read that page 62.

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