Daily Reprieve

From Courage to Change of Nov 11:

Insanity has been defined as doing something the same way over and over again and expecting different results. In the past I tried to control people, places, and things, believing that my way was the correct way. I knew my track record — my way, based on insisting upon my will, did not work. Yet I kept trying. It was an insane way to live.

Step Three, “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him,” was a turning point for me in relinquishing control. It meant choosing between an insane life and a sane one — my will or God’s will. Since my will had let me down time and time again, the real question was how long would I continue running around in the same circles before I was willing to admit defeat and turn to a source of genuine help?

Today’s Reminder

I may find it easy to point to the alcoholic’s irrational or self- destructive choices. It is harder to admit that my own behavior has not always been sane. Today I can let go of insisting upon my will. With this simple decision I make a commitment to sanity.

“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new end.”
~ As We Understood…

END OF QUOTE—————————————

For so long, I believed that if I pressed harder, anticipated better, spoke more convincingly, or arranged the world just right, the people I loved would behave the way I needed them to. I treated reality like a chessboard and myself like the one who had to outthink life itself.

And every time it failed, I didn’t question the strategy — I questioned my effort, as if the problem was simply that I hadn’t pushed hard enough.

That was the madness.

Step Three isn’t gentle the way we fantasize spirituality should be. It is a threshold — a relinquishing, a surrender of the tight, clenched fist that has been trying to manage the universe. It doesn’t require theological perfection; it simply asks:

Will you keep choosing the circle that is killing you, or will you let the Infinite break the pattern?

Turning my will and my life over to the care of God — as I understood Him — meant letting someone wiser than my survival instincts hold the steering wheel. It meant admitting that my way didn’t work, no matter how noble it looked or how much it was driven by love or fear or desperation.

This entry was posted on November 17, 2025 at 7:28 pm and is filed under Uncategorized with tags Addiction, Alcoholism, Courage to Change, faith, Journal, Life, mental-health, Personal, Recovery, Spirituality, writing. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.