Endigar 981
From Courage to Change of Aug 06:
I dreamt that I was trapped in a burning room. This smoke filled the air, and the only exit door was blocked by fire. As I gasped for breath, a hand appeared behind the flames, beckoning me to come. I knew that freedom, light, and air were on the other side of that door, and that certain death awaited me if I remained. Still, I hesitated. how could I walk through the fire?
Sometimes I feel the same way about the challenges I face in my waking life. Even when my position is hopeless and my Higher Power beckons, urging me to take a risk, I still hesitate, hoping for a miracle. I forgot that the miracle is already here. Today, thanks to Al-Anon, I have a Higher Power who is always here. Today, thanks to Al-Anon, I have a Higher Power who is always there for me, helping me to cope with my fears and find new, effective solutions to my problems. Thus, I am taken beyond the problems that once held me hostage. I am free to act or not to act, to take a chance, to hold off on a decision, to make choices that feel right.
Today’s Reminder
It takes courage to step beyond what is comfortable, predictable, and known. Courage is a gift from my Higher Power that I find in the rooms of Al-Anon and in the hearts of its members.
“Courage faces fear and thereby masters it.” ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.
END OF QUOTE—————————————
There are days when the fear feels cellular—like it was encoded in me before I ever had words for it. I can feel it tighten in my gut, that old companion of anxiety, whispering the same terrible stories: You’re not safe. You’re not capable. You’re not enough.
These aren’t rational fears. They’re relics—ghosts from the house I grew up in, where silence was loud, and love came with conditions. The damage wasn’t just environmental—it was spiritual. A haunting, inherited unease, as if I had been born already braced for impact.
In recovery, we often speak of fear as False Evidence Appearing Real, but when your nervous system was forged in chaos, the illusion feels like reality. Like being caught in a dream where the walls are on fire, and the exits are hidden behind emotional debris. Even when the flames are illusion, the burn is real.
But there is something remarkable that happens in the 12 Step program. I begin to awaken. Slowly. The nightmare begins to fade. Not because the fear disappears, but because I start to see it for what it is: a shadow from the past, not a command in the present.
When I hesitate, when I freeze before the next step, I try to remember—I am no longer alone. There is a Presence now. A Higher Power who does not demand I be fearless but invites me to be faithful. A Power that doesn’t just reside in some cosmic realm but shows up in quiet meetings, in the trembling voice of a newcomer, in the nod of someone who has walked through their own fire and lived.
The miracle isn’t that the fear is gone. The miracle is that I don’t have to obey it.
Now I am allowed to pause without shame. To act without certainty. To risk a better outcome than the one fear predicted.
This courage is not manufactured—it’s gifted. And like all spiritual gifts, it flows best when shared. So, I keep showing up, lending my presence to the room, hoping someone else might see in me what I see in them: not a broken survivor of a fire, but a living ember of healing light.
And that’s how we pass through the flames—together.
Daily Reprieve 
Leave a comment