Daily Reprieve

Courage to Change of Jun 8:

Step Six speaks of being entirely ready to have God remove all my defects of character. Yet I find that I often cling to my defects because they give me a certain amount of pleasure.

What defects could possibly give me pleasure? Revenge, for one. I spend lots of time creating mental scenarios in which I punish those who have hurt me. I also get a great deal of enjoyment from thinking that I am never wrong; in other words, I cling to my pride. Yet these characteristics are defects that get in the way of living the king of life I want to live and prevent me from treating myself and others with love and respect. There is abundant reason to let them go, but to do so, I have to become willing to lose the enjoyment they sometimes deliver.

My recovery will have a giant void as long as I am unwilling to give up my shortcomings. If I want healing, I must turn over my will, my life, and my character defects to God.

Today’s Reminder

Are the small, temporary pleasures I get from my defects of character worth the price I am paying to keep them? If not, I may be entirely ready to let some of them go today.

“I know that help is waiting only for my acceptance, waiting for me to say, ‘Not my will but Thine be done.”

~ The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage

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The primary focus of removing defects of character aka shortcomings is to remove thoughts and behaviors which impede my connection with my Higher Power. I suspect that some of them might remain to keep me in need of my Higher Power until other more subtle but insidious defects are discovered and targeted for removal. The litmus test for me is to ask what is getting in the way of being a part of something bigger than myself. What makes me devalue a fellowship that has my best interest at heart? What turns the genuineness of my interaction with the Higher Power into perfunctory ritual? What calls to me to become a god in isolation rather than a child of the Infinite, a dweller between the worlds?

I want to change frequencies and connect to the beyond. I am entirely ready.

This entry was posted on July 12, 2024 at 6:28 am and is filed under Uncategorized with tags Addiction, Alcoholism, Courage to Change, depression, health, inspiration, Journal, Life, mental-health, motivation, Personal, Recovery, Spirituality. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.