Daily Reprieve

From Courage to Change of May 24:

In the words of Oscar Wilde, “In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. The last is much the worst.”

Translation: My will gets me into trouble. I aim for some goal or other, but even when I get it, I am rarely satisfied. It doesn’t make my life complete, so I raise the ante, set a new goal, and push even harder. Or I don’t get what I want and feel inadequate or deprived. Maybe that is why not one of the Twelve Steps talks about carrying out my will.

The only times I have ever found lasting satisfaction were when I let go of self-will and committed myself to seeking the will of my Higher Power. Prayer and meditation are two means by which I seek to discover what God’s will holds for me, and they help me to gain access to the power to carry it out.

Sometimes my hopes and desires are forms of guidance. When I am willing to place God’s will above my own, those dreams have a chance of becoming a wonderful reality.

Today’s Reminder

The path to my true heart’s desire is to surrender to the will of my Higher Power.

“We know that God can and will do anything that is for our ultimate good, if we are ready to receive His help.” ~ The Twelve Steps and Traditions

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I want to be filthy rich. Obviously, my Higher Power’s will doesn’t seem to be invested in that goal. Is His will in conflict with mine? Why do I desire to be exceptionally wealthy? I would like to be free of financial anxiety. I would like to be able to help myself and others when it is needed. I would like to reward the significance of social investment. I would like to be powerful. It seems that what I truly desire is to be anchored in serenity, to be useful, to have respect. But why?

I see that if I was just handed the cash I would never ask the questions about my own motives. I would never delve into my psyche. I imagine that the further I dig, the more I discover my actual will is not at all in conflict with the Higher Power. It is that fearful, isolated, responsive will that is in conflict with my Higher Power and my Higher Self.

Thus, it might save me some time if I trust the will of my Higher Power and grow into the parallel fulfillment of both our wills. I suspect this to be true.

This entry was posted on September 17, 2023 at 5:12 pm and is filed under Uncategorized with tags Addiction, Alcoholism, Courage to Change, Journal, Life, Personal, Recovery, Spirituality. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.