Endigar 682 ~ The Treasure of the Past

From the Daily Reflections of January 28;

Showing others who suffer how we were given help is the very thing which makes life seem so worth while to us now. Cling to the thought that, in God’s hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have — the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them.  (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 124).

What a gift it is for me to realize that all those seemingly useless years were not wasted. The most degrading and humiliating experiences turn out to be the most powerful tools in helping others to recover. In knowing the depths of shame and despair, I can reach out with a loving and compassionate hand, and know that the grace of God is available to me.





I have heard that it is not good to write while depressed.  Under the influence of that dark cloud I have typed some of my most radioactive words.  Yet it is writing that seems to suck the venom from my invisible wounds.  So, if some darkness seeps through today’s post, forgive me.

I have some wasted time in my past that was the result both of my alcoholism and my co-dependence.  My goal is to recycle the pain and failures of experience into . . . what?  A higher, more potent version of myself?  Stronger, more realistic relationships?  Something desirable for my fellow sufferers to emulate?  If I can process refuse into raw material for others to build with, then I have become useful.  That seems like it would be a good way to live and die.

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