Endigar 451 ~ “Deep Down Within Us”

From Today’s Daily Reflections;

We found the Great Reality deep down within us. In the last analysis it is only there that He may be found. . . search diligently within yourself. . . . With this attitude you cannot fail. The consciousness of your belief is sure to come to you.   (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 55)

It was out of the depths of loneliness, depression and despair that I sought the help of A.A. As I recovered and began to face the emptiness and ruin of my life, I began to open myself to the possibility of the healing that recovery offers through the A.A. program. By coming to meetings, staying sober, and taking the Steps, I had the opportunity to listen with increasing attentiveness to the depths of my soul. Daily I waited, in hope and gratitude, for that sure belief and steadfast love I had longed for in my life. In this process, I met my God, as I understand Him.

END OF QUOTE

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I carve out a time when I awaken to meet with my Higher Power.  Often I approach with a belly full of anxiety.  I try to milk God for the blueprints of conquest for the day.  I get nothing.  So, I learn to make the carved out time say simply that “I desire to do Your will.”  If  He or She tells me, I am accountable to that word.  If God is silent, I am accountable to what I have last heard.  If that is not available to me, I am accountable to the next right thing spelled out in recovery and the principles of the steps.

I believe that as I make a habit of carving out time for just Gomu (God of my understanding) and I, that space will not remain void.  Eventually, I will approach in trust that both silence or inspiration can be filled with the presence of a loving God.  I am not alone.

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