Endigar 413 ~ Its Okay to be Me
From Today’s Daily Reflections;
Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives. . . . they have turned to easier methods. . . . But they had not learned enough humility. . . (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 72-73)
Humility sounds so much like humiliation, but it really is the ability to look at myself – and honestly accept what I find. I no longer need to be the “smartest” or “dumbest” or any other “est.” Finally, it is okay to be me. It is easier for me to accept myself if I share my whole life. If I cannot share in meetings, then I had better have a sponsor – someone with whom I can share those “certain facts” that could lead me back to a drunk, to death. I need to take all the Steps. I need the Fifth Step to learn true humility. Easier methods do not work.
END OF QUOTE
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I am working on my fourth 4th step. I think there are members of AA who have really good 10th step habits that do not need a periodic return to the moral inventory. I still find that I am my greatest resentment. If you are so inclined, I would appreciate your prayers today. I want to be thorough without becoming morbid. I would really like to be okay with me. For those of you who are also struggling with the writing out of your moral inventory in death-ink, I pray for you. May we find each other free of the bondage of self.
May 14, 2014 at 2:24 pm
You are doing great! Hardest part is starting…and you have done that! Thinking of you!!!
May 14, 2014 at 2:28 pm
Thank-you